I rose to the little barks of Ruby and Dino at about 9 in the morning. All I felt like doing was turn my back and drift off to wonderland. Nothing to think about, nothing to worry...the perfect Ethiopia. Instead, I got up and Dino came forward expecting his usual morning hug and kiss. I hugged him tight and patted the sleepy Ruby and decided to just stay relaxed the whole day. I was depressed and did not feel like doing anything. I know I had to get it all out of my system.
And you know what I did? I started cleaning up. I cleaned the prayer room. Took out all the stuffs and washed it. There were a lot to wash and I know its ridiculous to wash things we don't even use. But I did. I scrubbed, scrubbed, and scrubbed. Dad was right beside me helping me out. He did not ask why I was doing what I was doing. He just sat next to me and washed.
And in between all that I realised something.
My prayer stuffs are quite old. Existed even before I did. It was old yet with a little soap and a bit of scrubbing it shone like new! And that's when I realised that we all have strength in us. We all have the courage to do all that we want to. We don't need to succumb to fears. But, too often we forget how being brave feels like. We forget the face of courage. And we let things hurt us. We let people get to us. We hold on when we should let go. And all because we forget how much we have in us. So, today I'm washing my soul. Im scrubbing my heart. I am searching for strength and I'm looking for courage. Courage to get through the remaining days without fear of losing out. To get through the rest of my life not letting anything get to me. Not letting my emotions run high. Just simply going back to being who i was.