Sunday, January 30, 2011

A prayer for all.

To be or not to. That is the real question i suppose.

I wish people don't change and i wish love doesn't run out.
I wish for a life where animals are treated right and there isn't even one stray dog or cat out there.
I wish for a world where no one cries.
I wish for a nation in which poverty do not have a place.
I wish for a life in which all races and religion had the respect they deserve.
I wish and I wish
Oh how I wish life was different.

Dear God, pls bless every soul out there because they need you so much. I know you exist and I pray for you to show the way to those who are lost, just the way you do to me each day. Life is not only to be lived but to be appreciated as well.

Friday, January 28, 2011

When life hits you all of a sudden!

Wow! What a week i had! Right from the ponggal celebration to the outing with preena akka! I just love her! She is so niccceee! (Right Bagya?) Anyway, i wish i could tell you everything that happened...but I can't. I have toned down the excitement in me that it's not fair if i start writing now. Anyway, life has a funny way of reminding you of things doesn't it! Well people, all I can say is stop and breathe life one moment at a time. (kinda ironic for a person with panic attacks right?)

ps: What do you do when you don't know what to do? :) (still very much confused)

Sunday, January 23, 2011


Yet again, I'm compelled to ask this question. How do you know for sure that you are happy? Happiness is such an abstract concept. So, how do you find the "who" in that excerpt?
Simple.You look high and low and there comes a time in life when you lose the trust and love you had for everyone except your family. You tell yourself no one is worth your time or energy because all they do is leave you with tears behind.
Happiness to me is spending every moment as if it was your last. Spending every second with everyone without forgetting that they will break your heart sooner or later. Happiness is about laughing through the storm.

Happiness is not to be found but to be felt.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Rambles at 3.39 a.m


Ps: Something i tell myself often. But then again, what do you do when someone else is living the life you have always wanted? My choice? Simply hold your head high and walk away with pride. I'm trying. Honestly, I am.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Stoned and static.

Words fail to say all that my heart feels. I'm now a first year student in a field I never wanted to be in, but have come to slowly fall in love with. As night engulfs each day, all that i can see is that big 20 that would soon turn the corner. Am i matured enough to handle everything that would soon be thrown my way? I have no idea. I feel so scared and terrified. I feel i have wasted all my teen years trying to be "mature" that when it is finally here, I am lost. I have no direction to where I am heading. People I trusted are now strangers. People I loved are now haters. I try to be all smiley and yet I have this unresolved feeling in me. I am far from being the adult I want to be. Everything has changed and yet again nothing has. Where do you go for answers if you don't know what to ask?

Monday, January 10, 2011

To fall or not to fall?

What that doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I believe in that. I'm still searching for happiness but am slowly starting to accept the fact that happiness is everywhere if you stop looking. Maybe happiness lies in tolerance and maybe it lies in the simple everyday acts of our life. This are things no one ever teach us but rather knowledge that we acquire through the surroundings. Every wrong turn you take will make you stop and think before you make the next. Every adversity life puts you through will make you stronger for the next. And every wrong person you meet will just make you closer to meeting the right. Or is it? But, what happens when you can't read through their intentions or their exterior? What happens when you are too afraid to fall just because you are terrified that the person that is suppose to catch you will let you go forever? What happens then?

Friday, January 7, 2011


I love me more than anyone else would ever do. That isn't wrong I suppose. But, I don't deny the tug in my heart as I bawl over romantic movies or see a happy couple walking around. My soul would eventually find contentment in the arms of another. I believe that whole-heartedly. They say you can't find someone unless you go out there and mingle. But, I say, stay right where you are because if it was meant to be, it will be. There might not be a prince charming riding a horse carriage but there will definitely be a special someone doing crazy things for me. I am still that 10 year old i was. I believe in fairy tales, and happily ever-afters.
Romance makes every woman beautiful and every man a prince. I can imagine it now, the scent of red roses in my hands, the music only familiar to my ears as he sits across the table, like in the movies...the way my heart would beat..the way it is beating now as i sit here typing this out, and the candlelights, and the long walks, and the talks. I could see it all now. And i sure hope i see it as the years pass by and as i finally bump into my, "the one". The wait is long but i know i will make it. Who knows, he might be reading this right now. Who knows.....

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

I am a born people-pleaser and it bites me back at times!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Here comes........2011!!!!

I know I have been putting off writing for a while. I needed some space to grow up and i hope i have. I don't want to whine or complain any longer. Well, what can i say...when you are about to turn 20, u have to act 20. Life has been good. I had my share of confusion, frustration, tears, laughter, lots of family time,...etc during the last hols. And as such, i have welcomed in the year 2011 with open arms. Here are my new year resolutions:
1) Eat healthy
2) Act and think maturely
3) Stand up to what i believe in even if it means standing alone
4) Deal with my temper, panic attacks (breathe..just breathe Raevarthy)
5) Read more
6) Reduce the time i spend being online

How about you, my dear readers? What are your resolutions? Well, whatever it is, just remember that nothing is unachievable or too-high. If you dare to dream, wake up and chase after your dreams! All the very best!