Thursday, February 9, 2012

Appreciate life more.

Appreciate life more. I say that about a gazzilion times a day in my head. I walk around, not taking life seriously and when something bad happens, I automatically hear myself saying, "Its okay. You have so much more to be thankful of". Sounds normal? Well, it is not. I hate that I do that. Honestly.
Life is not suppose to be a big battle of things. It should be easy. It should be happy. There should not be sadness, misery, or anything unhappy. Life should be a natural process. I'm not making much sense kan? Well, I am not saying that I can't handle life. I can. It's just that I don't want to. I don't want to live in such a place where all I can see is darkness and all I crave for is the mere sight of light. I want to be young and carefree and happy. I just want to be happy. Of course, it's not that I am not happy now. But, I want such happiness that even the angels up there in heaven would be envious of. And if that is too impossible, then all I want is such happiness that would leave a smile on my lips when I fall asleep at night.
So yes, I am reminding myself to appreciate life more. And you should too. Even if you are hurting, confused, broken hearted, just appreciate life more. It is a gift that we are alive today.
But I would also say that I miss someone so badly. Someone I can never see again in my life. Of course I know that that someone is in a better place. I have come to accept that fact. But it's just that when I don't know what to do, I don't have a place to run to anymore. I don't have someone to depend on.
I wish things were different, yes I do. I wish life worked in reverse. I wish I can close my eyes, and go back to the past.
But there is no point in wishing. So I am opening my eyes wide, taking a deep breath, and appreciating life. After all, everything happens for a reason.

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