I look at the photo and was immediately hit by a pang of memories. Things that were, should be, and could have been. The voice that still rings in my head and the memories that cloud my conscience when I least expect them to. I close the photo tab on my lappy and instead stare at my teddy bear. And that flooded me with more memories. I would do anything to go back to last year. I would even gladly give up my life. I would do anything to turn time so that I had another day to say "I love you". I would relive all the embarrassment, the regret, the love that hurt, the heart broken times, the tears and all just to have more time with a person that meant the world to me.
What is life for if you have no idea where you are going? I have always been a person that took life a day at once. But today, I do not know where I am heading. There is no warning signals, no blinking lights and no echos. There is just emptiness for I have no one to turn to. How do you live with losing so many people and some times the same person for so many times? I am yet to unlock that mystery.
The door opens and in walks a friend. I look at her and can't help but think how much I am worth. Not only to her but to everyone. For the pain of losing someone is one that is excruciating.
If death took me tomorrow, would I be missed? Would there be a person that cried at the thought of not being able to see, or speak to me anymore? And if at all death visited, would I be worth death itself?