Thursday, July 11, 2013

Sometimes missing is just a part of moving on. :)

Tears and more tears. When someone mentions the word "love," your heart is ripped in ways no one, even you thought is possible. How do you explain what you feel? Every part of your brain is embedded with memories, memories so distant to the mind but close to the heart. Do we really move on from that? Is forgetting someone you once loved, that difficult? How do you say "goodbye" for one last time and really mean it? If you could flush away thoughts of how your "once loved one" smiled, his/her smell, the way he/she used to tease you, all the "I love you's" said, the hugs exchanged and the hands which locked perfectly together, then life would be perfect, wouldn't it?
"MOVE ON" your brain screams at you and yet your heart whispers slowly, murmuring words of love that you never once knew could end. A terrifying experience, isn't it? 
People tell you that with time things would get better. They tell you how that girl or guy never really loved you and that you deserve someone way better, someone who won't break your heart. People hold your hands, trying to make you feel better. They pretend to listen to you as you go on and on about how much love you invested in, how screwed up you feel and how you wish it was all just a bad dream. And really tell me, how does it make you feel? More torn? More lonely? It should. 
Someone asked me this question today: "Why is it so hard to forget someone you once loved" I thought about it. And I decided I am not going to sugar coat words. Let me tell you the truth. We simply can't forget what was once ours. We may just "not remember" any longer with the passing years but forgetting? Impossible! 
That being said, remember this. You can't move on if that particular space is not filled with something else, something way better than what love offered you. I always say this: CONCENTRATE ON YOURSELF!
Love yourself the same way you would want someone to love you. That person who once walked out on you is not going to return. Get that first. Take a few days to swallow that fact. It is difficult, I understand. Cry, Eat, Sleep, Shop, do whatever you want to do. But always tell yourself that you are going to move on from this. Tell yourself that things would get better. Find someone who will just listen to you ramble and do just that. Talk non-stop. 
Let me also tell you this. There is no point picking up the phone, dialing, texting or staring at old messages. There is just no point chasing after something that is not meant to be. Trust me, I know this is tough to hear but you need to or else you will suffer for years to come holding on to just dust when you could have diamonds in your hands.
I don't promise you that things would get better now. I don't promise you that your pain will heal tomorrow. But I promise you that it will one day. You will wake up one day and find yourself healed. No visible scars or wounds. And when that day happens, no one will be able to wipe that smile off your face. You will be the stronger, bolder, just so much more amazing version of yourself. This is possible, just believe. 

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