So not me!

YEAY! I'm back in Blogger! It feels awesomely good to be back n i have been having a fantastic few days! Ok, fine, that was a lie. In fact, I had never been a good lier. So, the truth is I have been having a few "lonely" days. You know, the days when nothing ever goes right and yet you can't find anything to complain about? Well, maybe I am so ungrateful after all. I had a fabulous S.B.E experience which made me fall madly in love with children, i survived my cruel B.I.G, and I had a lot of fun going out to hunt for food with Bagya. So, what's the fuss about life? Well, I don't know. I feel like my soul is not at peace. Its as though I stole a banana from a starving monkey( which i will never do, btw,) and now feel bad for it. Except, the banana is not real and neither is the monkey. Get me? I know. I just have a way of making things get so complicated. Please allow me to explain.
I feel as though I am giving up on myself and if you know me, you know that I love myself so much which makes me almost like a steel. No harsh words can crush me, an no cruel remarks can hurt me, or so i thought. But lately, I feel as though nothing I do is ever good enough. Sometimes, I wonder when I'd be free from trying to please everyone. I'm so tired of being the "good' girl. Sometimes, i want to scream at the top of my lungs, I want to do things I want and I just want to act plain stupid. But, my inhibitions are killing me. And frankly, I'm lost. Like a child that got lost in the supermarket. Thats how I feel.
I have no where to turn to, no one to talk too and it's killing me because this is so not me. Help me, GOD!

Being a mum...:)

So its no secret now that I am a proud mum of 2 wonderful kids ( a 4 year old poodle and a 3 year old shih-tzu cross). They are the reason I breathe in each day with a positive note. When I hit rock bottom, they are always there to push me up( with cute little barks). Anyway, the one thing I really enjoy doing as a mum is going grocery shopping with my own mum. Its really fun comparing prices and picking out fresh food and of course planning their meals for the week( i cannot believe i just said that, makes me sound like im a 30 year old right?) But, honestly, when kids my age are out there having fun, im at home spending quality time with my family and im very proud of it.
So, anyway, being a mum is tough but it's worth every moment and every second of the day. I'm happy and very grateful that i have the both of them. I know they don't judge me and I know they love me with all they have. N i would gladly give my life away for them. I will never hesitate. Now and forever.

Just for u, Bagya.

Fuh! Wat a day I had! It has been a very long time since I had last laughed that much! Being roommates with someone that you can totally be yourself is truly fun. We talk about the most random stuffs in the world! We laugh at odd hours. We be ourselves around one another! No hidden feelings. And today I celebrated my pre-BIG trip at Bangsar's Anandha Bavan with her. OMG! The food was amazing, im not joking! Me being the princess that I am did not even know the place existed so near to us. But, hey, life is all about learning right. So, I may be a slow learner but I'm definitely learning. And, you can't complain when you have great teachers. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart Bagya. When you read this, I will be away for the damn BIG trip. And of course I wont be able to see you for the next 2 weeks. So, I don't think you would miss me as much as I did miss you when you were away. Just remember that, no matter what happens, you are so strong that you can move mountains if you belief in yourself! I'm sure you will do well in your literature presentation. So, quit worrying k. And yes, if you see small boy around, make sure you stop for a second and imagine me laughing. Coz, thats exactly what I always do. And do update me on whats going on here in college. Will definitely look forward to ur msg. Remember, u r strong when u think you are not. Me <3>