Be beautiful. Be amazing. Be magnificent. Above all, be you. :)

I was here a few months ago still figuring out how to take the next step in my life. Too many things at once happened way too fast. I was lost and sinking. I owe it to my cheery personality and gigantic smile that saves me each time I dwell into my emotions. That is going to change...right about now.
You know, it takes inspiration to write and you gotta know, my inspiration has a way of striking at the oddest of hours. But I have to be here now. I have to pen this down. I am in a point in my life right now that it feels good to simply be me. Oh no no, I ain't perfect but that's okay. I am me.
I have battled the worst of demons, I have sunk way more times than you ever will and I am still gasping for air. But know what, it feels good. It feels good to grow up.
Today I want to tell you how important it is to believe in yourself. You have to know this because it took me a long time to really trust myself, my emotions and my dreams. If I had a chance to rewind to the last few years of my life, I will hold my own head high up and tell myself that I am strong and I can do this. I will tell myself that life is what I make of it. But, I can't. So let me tell you that today. I can start telling you one story after the next of which I saw dead ends and yet I raised from my own ashes to be strong and still it will be just a story. So, let me draw from you. Let me take you to a journey to understand yourself.
Bad things happen. That's just the way things are. You can't question anyone for anything that has been happening in your life. No one owes you anything, and that includes GOD. You see that challenge? That mountain ahead? The dead end? It is just an illusion. You can break through it. My dear, you can so do this. You are stronger than what you believe. Nothing bad ever happens to us. It is what we make of situations that determines what the outcomes are. You are a magnificent human being with so much to offer the world. Rise now. Put your hands over your heart. Feel that? You are alive. You can do so much from just being alive. Gotta dream you wanna achieve? Start now. You wanna break free from a sinking relationship? Do it now! You wanna follow what your heart says? Go ahead! It is your life and yes, you have all the abilities and talent in the world to lead your own life!
Be beautiful. Be amazing. Be magnificent. Above all, be you.

Being single isn't a misfortune. It is a privilege, a choice and a decision.

So here I am. At a juncture in my life in which all my friends are either attached, getting engaged, or dating in the hopes of finding that "someone" to spend the rest of their lives with and I am still jotting down notes, adding on to an already long list of what I want in a prince charming and yes, I still refer him as "prince charming". I am officially 23, i am independent, i am in love with life and yes, i am waiting patiently to be swept off my feet by the perfect guy. Of course, perfect here is subjective and before you start arguing with me that there is no such thing as perfectness, i'll tell you that I see imperfection as the most beautiful thing on Earth and that is perfect to me.

So, here I am. A post on an idiot who is stuck in a tree I suppose. But the catch is, I am not impatient. I am not waiting to fall in love. I am completely, head over heels in love with my life. I am doing things that I love. I am exploring stuffs and I am meeting so many wonderful people who are teaching me new things about everything under the sun. So really, I am ok. 

This post is meant to tell you that it doesn't matter if you are still single. It doesn't matter if everyone thinks you should already be attached to someone and yes, there is absolutely nothing to rush about. You are you. You are young. You are beautiful. You are worth your own opinion. Never ever feel rejected, overwhelmed or not worthy of a relationship. Trust me honey, there is nothing wrong with you. 

Remember this. Life is so so so big. There is so much about yourself for you to learn about. There is so much about you that you can fall in love with. Of course it will get lonely but when you learn that there is a happiness in that alone time, you will understand what I am talking about. 

Love is an amazing feeling. An out of this world experience that you deserve to have with the right person. Never get in a relationship just because you think you are getting older or just because someone is in love with you. Ask yourself, are you in love with that person? Can you imagine not spending the rest of your life with that person? Does it hurt? If your answer is no to any of that question, then stop. Stop wanting to settle for anything less than what you deserve. 

And yes, there is such a person called "Prince Charming" and "Princess Charming". He/She is out there somewhere. He/She will come into your life at the right moment and just like a tornado it will hit you one day without you even realising. And it will be the most unique feeling ever. Trust me, it is worth the wait. 

Signing off with love,
a princess who is in love with her life while waiting for her prince. 

Just when I thought, I am okay.

And a month later I am here. This blog is serving more as a shoulder to lean on rather than expressing my views on matters. As much as I despise that, I know it takes emotions to write and right now, this is what I feel. Kinda doesn't sound that matured considering the fact that I just turned 23 this week. But then again, my heart has always been extra sensitive and my soul is complaining that it can't keep up. So, where do I go then?
Been having a roller coaster ride in terms of emotions for me. I feel the spark in me slowly turn off and despite the fire still burning, it isn't glowing. Turning 23 felt a lot lonely and less celebratory for me. Probably due to the fact that I am not used to being away from home on the day of my birthday. I missed mum, dad, even the sister who is in another country, the love of my life, my Baby Dino and above all, I miss the one who has gone to another world. That left me bawling out like a child in the night, much to the dismay of my friends. Trust me, when I break, it is with a loud crash. But then again, crying is good for the soul. It cleanses parts of you, allowing you to move on. But moving on just seems like a huge word for me. I am still here, caught up in hidden emotions, trying not to mix it all up.
School has been good so far. I love my job and I certainly look forward to waking up each and every morning to go to school. Been having a little problem with some children but I believe that would be solved soon. I have fallen madly and deeply in love with a small child that I am tutoring. He can't read well in English and struggles through but honestly, he is a sweetheart. His willingness to learn and the extent to which he pushes himself reinforces my principle that the best way to teach is from the heart, out of love. I'll definitely put up a post dedicated to him soon.
Apart from that, I feel that my life is moving on but I am not. I don't know how to exactly pen down with words all that I am feeling but I can tell you this, it hurts to feel lonely in a crowded room.