Words flow easy when you are feeling a certain way. A way that brings about questions of why. If you know me personally, you would know how I say that we should never regret the decisions we take, the mistakes we make and the choices we choose from. Never live life in regrets. That's what I always said. And yet, a couple of days ago I sat opposite a good friend in a restaurant and held back tears as I thought of a memory of someone close to my heart. A memory that I can't seem to get rid of. That's what happens when you decide not to live life in regrets I spose.
How is it that something you felt was so right back then bites to the core when thought of now? I can't figure that out. I am not the kinda girl that holds back to people or things that hurt. I am the kinda girl that walks away when I know something is hurting me. But why is it that despite walking away, I am still haunt by memories? You know how sometimes we say that God puts people in our lives for a reason? To make us stronger? To weave something in us that last forever? I believe in that.
Then I spose that I should believe that this happened for a good reason too? My only question is of "what if". What if I choose differently back then? Will I still be the same girl I am today? Strong on the outside but broken into pieces on the inside. I guess that's an answer I will never know.